Disapeared from xanga for a long time, so much. A night "learning" Cartography (ya~just start two days before exam~), like my studying, this semester has been so messy. Everything did not go as planned. I was not sure what i am, where i am and what i should do. Just wanted to hide myself from everything. Home seemed the only place to keep away from trouble. But i still wanted to stay on streets and do nothing alone. I put a lot of things on me. Just to keep me busy and stop my mind from thinking. Turn out all were chaos. Disappointing...to me at least, I was not sure what i actually wanted deep in my heart. Going round and round, and back to the starting point. Sorting things out, too much to do and too little motivation. Day by day, night by night, simply not good enough. Glad that i have people around me to help me get throught these, especially Gessence, thanks for all of your tolerance. The good of you guys get me covered. I have no idea how my mind change, but i am sure that such change is phenomenal to the couples of decays later. With you, my life is back on track now, at least my mind is. And my will is stronger than ever to tackle everything. You trust me even though i am not the best kind of men. You have faith in me even though i did something that hurt you. I really want you to know, you worried about too much about yourself. My heart is locked with you in it. Now i have the strength to puch myself even further to the edge, i know^^ Welcome to the new Nel. | 
